I don’t have any fight
left in me.
I find myself saying Yes,
my soul saying No.
I keep forcing the battle
into a MMA cage,
My heart still comes bruised,
rusty and wasted.
The only sign outside
are the half moon
dents implanted
in the palm of my hand.
I’m so tired,
Wanting to stay
in my bed tired,
my face in a pillow.
I need a release.
Something more than
shattering a wall
of disappointment.
Filed under Poetry
You are a ray of sunshine
That’s what they used to say,
Now, I’m tainted.
What used to be a golden shine,
Now is an orange tainted musk,
That flickers like an old flame.
I heard this line in a song once,
“The moon is a lie without the sun.”
Did I only shine because of society’s light?
Do I only project what I receive?
When did I become that person?
So shallow and undeserving.
I’m avoiding mirrors,
Friends and family,
Ashamed.
I need my light,
My shining light as bright as child’s smile.
I can find my way back.
I want to feel like
A sunflower in the summer,
With no doubt of who to worship.
My unwavering focus
On a path,
To redemption.
Filed under Poetry
I write
so that you and I
can come alive.
In these 8 x 11 borders
we can be free
to know we can breathe.
Eyes can peer
fingers may hold us
but we don’t fuss
We are alive
taking long walks
across each lined block.
Greeting our fellow
vowels and consonants
that make our love sonnet.
Our only fault
to think we are immortal
when we are written in pencil.
Filed under Poetry, Uncategorized
I am no longer new and shiny,
The gloss has worn off from wear and tear,
I sink to the bottom of the deck,
To sit among the others who are not worthy.
Betrayal, Jealousy, Anger
A few emotions that are cancer to the heart,
A dark cloud that encompasses your soul,
Leading you to feel discarded in a hole.
It’s hard to shake a feeling so strong,
A loss of one’s worth is destructive,
Although, it can take a single good thought,
A prick of a needle to deflate the balloon.
It takes some remembering,
A jolt of electricity to kick start the mind,
To rescue the heart that is badly beaten,
Pull it up from beyond and nurse it slowly.
The end is as important as the beginning,
A person’s life sets off in directions by catalysts,
Beginnings of journeys can change a person’s life,
Webs interconnect from heart to heart.
I am a catalyst.
The first domino to fall,
I started a person’s major life journey,
My part is just now over.
Filed under Poetry
Remember the sunset.
This line walks through my head.
A prayer?
A plea?
Damn, you make things so hard.
Hard to move,
Hard to see,
Everything just hard.
I’ve lost feeling,
intermittent joy,
my poetry is lifeless,
no great written epiphanies.
I sit
in a great dark room,
indian style,
hands in my lap.
Visitors don’t come and go,
food does not slide under the door,
just me and the silence,
the sunset painted on the walls.
Filed under Poetry
I think in words,
syllables as building blocks,
a game of tetris until
the right pieces fit.
Phrases bounce around,
turning into stanzas,
til stanzas fit stanzas,
so a poem sits right here.
You are the random bolt,
the square in my round peg,
the lost instructions,
you are my monday morning.
You sit on the tip of my tongue,
waiting to dive into my throat,
so I can give you life through,
my voice that hides in the back,
I’m missing the lego piece,
that connects you to,
my inner realm that
flows out of this pen.
You are scary.
Knowing you can disrupt
with so much calm,
something so sacredly simple.
Filed under Poetry
I love you,
but not like that.
I’m a good liar,
you see –
My morning routine consists
of putting on a mask,
blending together so that
the end is the beginning.
I love you,
but not like that.
I’m a good liar,
you see –
I speak in a different tongue
when I see your eyes,
it leaves a foreign taste,
but I always get a response.
I love you,
but not like that.
I’m a good liar,
you see –
When our fingers brush
goosebumps spread,
I’m rigid like a statue,
nerve endings on pause.
I love you,
but not like that.
I’m a good liar,
you see –
I write this poem
with a broken pen,
truth leaks out the top,
no control over the ink.
I love you,
but not like that.
I’m a good liar,
you see?
Filed under Poetry
You
have
my heart.
I
just need
your name.
Whisper
it in
my ear,
so
my heart
can sing.
Write
it in
my palm,
So
you touch
my soul.
You
have
a home,
in
my
imagination,
give
me
a key,
to
allow
my eyes,
the
ability
to decieve,
my
mind
that won’t,
believe
you
would be,
here
for
me.
Filed under Poetry
Epiphanies are rare,
but when they come
they are a rush
of fresh fall air.
Internally grateful,
it flows through my body,
relieving the knots
of worry and doubt.
A drug that I need daily,
a single thought,
the right thought,
the key to functionality.
How do I keep them flowing?
Keep my blood rushing?
How do I keep from looking down?
So, I can ride this for eternity.
Filed under Poetry
An Everyday Girl's Outlet 