Conversation running through my head
Like a movie
Voices are haunting my dark bedroom
So much so
That I can’t form any more words
For this insipid poem
Been battling feelings
Of the sinful nature
Been rolling around
In skin that’s not mine
It is so freeing
To be self-indulging
Knowing they are
Throwing me side glances
For something is peculiar
Must give up
Of living as my alter ego
Crawl out into
my old world
The feeling of sin
upon my skin.
Help me forget
What I don’t want to remember
With a touch so soft
Lips lead me into a distant world
Turn my head into a foggy morning
With nibbles and tickles
Bury me deep in sensations
So my eyes will never yearn to open
I sat talking across from the person that knows me too well.
She is the mirror that I can’t avoid.
I have been fooling myself for so long,
I don’t normally get away with it this long.
Trying to justify my inner feelings
It’s normally a breeze to put feelings on paper,
But I’m having a hard time admitting those words.
“You are not that type of person.”
How do you ignore that statement?
They are words that seep into your psyche.
None of this makes any sense.
But I suppose it shows the truth,
Of how my head is truly working.
One last thought before I go,
I want to forgive you,
But I’m no longer that person
I’m the person you made me become.
I don’t know how to change that.
Sometimes when I’m writing
I don’t know who or what
My words are about
Like my heart is writing for me
Until my head can catch up